I felt God calling

Trudy Rigg/ Land with John Winterton and Lindsay Hyde

Being called to Elder in the Community of Christ means many things to me. It represents recognition. I know this call is not about reward but I feel in some way it is. I know the wider population of the Church doesn’t know me and they don’t know my back story. I am the youngest of four children, my father died when I was 8 months old and my mother when I was 27 years old. It must have been extremely hard for my mother in 1961 to raise four children. Sadly she never recovered from the loss of her husband and this led to her having aggressive and sometimes violent outbursts.  As I have grown older, I have developed an appreciation of just how hard it must have been for her, navigating life without her husband and having four kids to worry about. I see her now as resilient, strong and brave and amazing in many ways. We were always fed, clothed and never felt we were missing out on anything. However I never felt her love. I felt inadequate and suffered with a guilt complex that everything was my fault. 

Across from our home on the corner of Logan and Campbell street in Frankston stood this little wooden building, called the “Reorganized Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints.” It took me years of practice to recite the name and by then the name changed. For a dyslexic child this was very hard!

This building was my safe place, the place that taught me about love, honesty and trust. My mother sent us kids across the road to Sunday school. I formed lifelong friendships and attended Mountain Hut camps, Skylarks and Oriels, and youth club and was front and centre at any fundraisers. My mother only stepped into the building on two occasions that I can remember. However she was always willing to help with fundraisers and if any one needed anything, “Mrs. Land would have it.” They would simply cross the road and ask my Mum.

This Church and the people in it are in my heart and soul; it is part of me, even when I drifted away as a young adult it was part of me. Whenever I would call in on the odd Sunday I was welcomed with open arms; it felt like I was home.

During the years I didn’t attend church, life was really hard. I am a survivor of domestic violence. I had a serious car accident where I was told I may never walk again. I had a house fire and lost everything I owned, while raising three children and one foster child on my own, suffering bouts of depression. While working and raising the kids, I went back to school and educated myself; my life began to change for the better.

I am married to the loveliest man who came into my life 24 years ago with no children, and now he is a loving father to four, and grandfather to 10. My children and I have been blessed to have him on the journey with us.

In later years when I reconnected and started attending Church regularly, I wanted to give back to these people who had made a difference in my life.  I volunteered where I could and when I could, navigating fulltime work that included lots of travelling.

I was baptized when I was 50 years old. What a fantastic birthday gift! My husband who does not attend church shed a tear at my baptism as he knew how much this meant to me.

When I was called to priesthood some years later my husband supported me. When I told my siblings I was being called to priesthood, they too shared their memories of this Church and what it meant to them. We have such great memories.  However, one sibling said church “was only for babysitting”. My quick response was, “I couldn’t ask for better baby sitters.”

My aim is to make a difference for the better in people’s lives the way this church made a difference in mine. 

I now take my grandchildren to church and involve my children when I can, and my husband and friends are coming on the journey.

When I was recently called to Elder and I told my husband that I would be asked to give a response his advice was “You only need to respond with a yes!”

Below is the response I gave to my call.

My response to my call

On my husband’s advice I only need to respond with a Yes’. However you all know me better than that. I can’t help myself when it’s my turn to speak. So thanks for the advice husband!

And it is a yes! But there is more I want to say.  

Firstly thank you to those in the Church that heard the call.  Because I heard it too.

I felt God’s call some time ago and there was nothing I could do about it.

This call seemed to feel stronger when I stood down as Pastor, it was very powerful. 

However I doubted my feelings, I doubted and asked why me, I don’t understand.  

When I stood down from the role as Pastor, I just kept doing what I do, providing ministry and leadership, with no official position to do that.  I don’t really look at what I did and do as ministry.  

What I do for this church and the people connected to it comes naturally to me; it’s like an instinct.  And I don’t always get it right.

I am not your typical priest and do not have the ingrown teaching of this church in me. I don’t come from a family with history in this church, but I am changing that by teaching my grandchildren about this church and about the Holy Spirit.  My grandchildren and I are learning together. This Church played a significant role in my life as a child and during my teenage years.  It was a safe place, my safe place and you all accepted me.  So I thank you for that.

I sat and made peace with it, I prayed for God’s guidance, knowing there was much more for me to do.  I did not pray to be called to Elder. I simply prayed for guidance and support for me to become a better person and better Pastor, Minister, Friend, Mother, Wife and Grandmother.  I know this role l am being called to is not a reward, however I feel like it is.

Reading the information about a call to Elder it is in many ways very overwhelming, exciting and confronting.  Some of the qualities needed for this role I feel I don’t have, maybe I do but I just don’t see them. I come across as confident but in reality I am not. I doubt myself, I second guess myself, I worry.  However I am faithful to the church, I am protective of it and what it means to each of you. 

As for the qualities of an Elder, I do have some of these, I am community minded, and I invite others to Christ. The ministry I provide comes naturally, comes with human qualities such as anxiety, impatience and the need to feel good and be accepted for what I do. 

I need to know I am doing a good job. I know I do my role in the church differently to the way others have, but that doesn’t mean I get it wrong; it just means I do it differently. I am ready to give more to my Church, to my God, and provide further ministry.  I think I was the last person baptized at Frankston and that was nearly 14 years ago.

I think mine was the last wedding held here.  I hope we can change that. I want to open the doors to new blessings, baptisms, weddings, funerals and more.

When John Winterton told me there was a call for me to Elder, of course I said yes straight away. Over the weeks leading up to this point, I started losing my nerve. I doubted my ability; I feel this role is more important than any I have undertaken in the Church, I want to do it justice. I have looked at the training material and in confidence can stand true to the majority of what is expected in this role. For me it is about the sentiment of the role. It’s about doing something more, something deeper at a deeper level and bringing people into our church and to God.

Socrates stated “There is only one good, and that is knowledge, and one evil, and that is ignorance”   I am not ignorant to the fundamentals of our church and the Bible, but growing knowledge is powerful. Being willing to learn is powerful.  Understanding we all bring different qualities to the table is powerful and accepting the difference is powerful.

John 13:7

Jesus said, “What I am doing you do not understand now, but afterward you will understand.”

To me this is so true.  There is so much I don’t understand and one day I will! This statement from Jesus is set in a context but for me it can also stand alone. “What I am doing you do not understand now, but afterward you will understand.”

Parents do many things a child doesn’t understand, and then when that child grows and becomes more knowledgeable they do understand. Not so long ago women weren’t given these opportunities in the Church. So I accept this call for all the women who paved the way and were never recognised for the contribution they made to the church. I respect you and admire you.

I want to thank my husband who supports my choices and what I believe in and he is essentially a good human being, kind, caring and he gives me the confidence to take on the challenges in life.

I welcome this call, I am nervous, I doubt myself but I am also proud and grateful.

To the Kinship families and those of you who are learning about this Church, be curious, ask questions, gain knowledge and know that you are welcome, your friends and family are welcome and we love the connection we have with you. I am grateful for the friendships I have formed with you,

I thank you for your support with some of my crazy ideas.  You help me to get job done. And I thank each of you in this congregation for trusting me and believing in me. I thank those who have been my mentors.

Thank you. Trudy Rigg / Land